Nativity of the Blessed Virgin Mary

Joseph is a righteous man, and that is why he was unwilling to expose Mary to shame.

To understand that, we have to look back to the book of Deuteronomy, where we get the law of Moses for the people living in the land of Israel. It addresses what happens when a man marries a woman who claims to be a virgin and then discovers that she is not. There is a process to follow, but it amounts to this: he takes her to the city gate, shames her before the elders, and then she is taken to the entrance of her father’s house and stoned to death for having lied to him. Cf. Deut 22:13–21.

That is what Joseph is not doing.

And that sheds a different light on the law of Moses. So often, we think of the law as laying out all these precepts and telling us, “This is what you are to do.” Yet here the Scriptures tell us that Joseph was righteous, so he did not do that.

Much of the law of Moses places limits on our worst instincts. It places a limit on what justice can demand. Imagine being in that situation: you marry a girl and discover that she has been lying to you—that she has slept with half the town or something. You are going to want revenge. The law of Moses allowed you to take vengeance on her, but no one else. You could not go track down all the men. You could not slaughter her family for having raised a bad daughter. You could not do all the things that, in our brokenness, we might want to do.

The law placed limits on vengeance and justice. It helped constrain us. But it did not mandate that we do those things.

In Saint Joseph, we see a better way. In his righteousness, Joseph has compassion on his betrothed. He does not yet realize that she is pregnant by the Holy Spirit. He thinks she has been with another man. But he does not wish to shame her publicly or have her put to death. He simply wants to move on and let them go their separate ways.

Notice what that says about Joseph: he is completely free. He is not chained down by bitterness, a desire for revenge, or anger at Mary. He is free to act with true compassion and mercy and move on from the situation.

That is what we should all be striving for. But I think that is difficult for us, especially if we grew up in the United States. We have been told our whole lives what our rights are, and we can feel that we ought to invoke every one of them in every situation.

So often, though, that is not the right choice. It inflames our passions, makes us worse, and makes us slaves to our basest desires.

What we should be striving for is the freedom Joseph experienced in this moment: the freedom to show compassion and mercy without being weighed down by all those things. That is what we are to strive for as Christians.

Joseph could have invoked his rights, and it would not have been a sin. But he would not have been a righteous man. He would have been just the normal guy.

We are to strive for righteousness. That means seeking the way Christ would have us live, rather than invoking every right we have or doing everything that might be permissible. It means seeking the way of compassion and mercy for everyone we meet, striving for holiness above all else.

That is our calling. And that is what we should strive for more and more every day.